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R-E-S-P-E-C-T: 25 Ways To Show ItCopyright 2004 Laurie Weiss, Ph.D.Convicted criminals report that their violent behavior wascaused by perceived disrespect.*Everyone wants to be treated with respect, but respect meansdifferent things to different people. It also meansdifferent things in different cultures, so treating otherswith respect often becomes a serious problem. If you want toavoid offending someone by being disrespectful, you mustthink about both what they need and how you act.Respect sometimes means1. Look at me¬make eye contact!2. Dont look at me.3. Listen attentively when I speak4. Respond to what I mean instead of to what I say. That often means respond to my emotions as well as to my words.5. Ignore my emotions when I am supposed to appear strong.6. Keep the agreements you make with me.7. Keep time agreements with me. Dont keep me waiting.8. Notice what seems to be important to me and comment on it.9. Remember what I like and dislike.10. Dont force me to encounter things I hate.11. Allow me my privacy.12. Dont ignore me.13. Acknowledge everything I do well.14. Dont demean me by commenting on my expected work.15. Offer to shake hands.16. Never disagree with me.17. Challenge my thinking.18. Dont interrupt me.19. Interrupt me, it means you are listening and you care. (New York)20. Protect me.21. Challenge me¬give me tough things to do.22. Always speak in a calm way.23. Match the energy of my excitement.24. Always use my title.25. Use my first name.Yes, it is contradictory! How can you sort it out? First andforemost, recognize that people are different from you andfrom each other.Be mindful of the Golden Rule, Do unto others as you wouldhave them do unto you.Be even more mindful of the Platinum Rule, Do unto othersas they would have you do unto them.Pay attention to how others respond to you and, whenpossible, when you can do so without violating your ownprinciples, treat them as they expect and wish to betreated.*Violence: Reflections on a National Epidemic .by JamesGilligan, MDPermissions:You may publish this article free of charge in your ezine,web site, ebook or print publication so long as thecopyright notice and the resource paragraph (at the end ofthe article) are included.Laurie Weiss, Ph.D.Email: [email protected]
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